Encountering Resistance

 

I've been undergoing some pretty cool lifestyle changes, and I knew going in it was going to be difficult to maintain the energy for three weeks - which is how long it takes to create a new habit.  Some aspects - the Kundalini guided meditation, the orgasmic meditation, some of the changes in listening tracks - have been smooth.

Others - the changes in physical exercise, even the beat music - I'm encountering some strong resistance now.  I dumped the Kundalini app, which felt like far too much work and not aligned with where I'm at right now.

I'm also experiencing far too much "money bleed," which is one of the aspects of resistance, it often shows up not just as physical and emotional issues but financial as well.  

Resistance is to be expected.  There's nothing shameful about encountering resistance.  There's nothing wrong with acknowledging it and appreciating it for what it is.  This is a key aspect to truly working through the resistance.

When my body says it is fatigued, I have to listen.  I can't just plow through stubbornly, that's how injuries and illness happen.  It doesn't mean I need to give it, but I need to honor the warning signs and separate the resistance showing up as fatigue from my body's genuine need for rest. One must be worked through, the other honored fully.

That doesn't mean I stopped doing pushups.  I adjusted to account for gym days while keeping on track.  

The resistance to the beat tracks is interesting. I enjoy listening to them, but I find myself switching out to other things like meditation tracks - which is fine, still taking a break from the unconscious "familiar" music.  I also notice I miss the old "liked" playlist. Which is totally understandable - they're liked for a reason.  So this is more about gently redirecting back to my goals while honoring my preferences, and avoiding too much of one thing. (And avoiding other things, like TV and social media.)

The spending patterns and "bad financial luck" is an interesting one.  My unconscious patterns show up in my spending and consumption habits.  And here a much more conscious approach is called for.  Mindless austerity is as bad as mindless spending, because it still avoids the conscious awareness aspect.  What am I buying?  Is is something I need or serves my purpose, or is it a "shiny object" or a thoughtless purchase that's likely to feel like a ripoff down the road?  

My relationship with money and spending is a manifestation of some of the unhelpful patterns that show up in my communication, following through on tasks and other issues that I resist confronting head-on.  I avoid the conscious examination process and fall into unhelpful emotional habits.  For example, I wanted to kick the Bob I have in the back porch.  I couldn't find the sparring socks, so I ordered another pair.  Not a huge purchase, but unnecessary.  A more thorough search revealed the missing socks.  

Supplements is another area I waste on.  I focus on what they're supposed to do, not how they're actually benefitting me - or not.  Do I need this?  Is it serving me or am I just wasting money on crap because I want it to work?  I can think of a few things that really aren't serving me and need to wean myself off of unconscious consumption "for my well-being."  It's wish-casting, which is a common unconscious pattern of mine - I don't want to fully examine the issue so I imagine this pill, or this app, or this trick, will take care of the problem.  

Then there are subscriptions, "surprise fines," investment losses and associated "junk" that adds up and is a drain not only on my finances but on my overall energy and mood.  And I don't believe they're "accidental" or just "things that happen in life."  They're unconscious patterns manifesting over and over.  

And I'd say of all the resistance and leakages I currently experience, the financial resistance and leakages are currently the most pronounced and most oppressive.  There's also the most room for conscious examination and improvement.  

I've got two weeks (a little less) left of this phase of transformation.  And I don't have to be perfect at sustaining everything, overall I'm doing well.  But I really intend to use these next two weeks to better examine the aspects that have me "falling off the wagon."  Stress with work and home, anxiety about changes I want in my life, physical fatigue, mental fatigue, "boredom," unconscious patterns that could be a form of hypnosis I just need to break.  

And also, what patterns are changing?  Clearly, the fact I'm speaking to the resistance and examining it consciously instead of taking it personally or just writing it off as magical "backsliding" is something new and positive.  So is the overall energy, not to mention I look and feel better physically.  

Taking concrete action instead of wishful or magical thinking, that's a big distinction.  

Sure Beats Letting the World Make Me Angry

 

Changing up my routine this week has been NICE! Let’s see how long I can keep this vibe going. 

Sexy Beats Musings

 

It’s noonish on a Saturday and I’m chilling on the couch listening to some sexy beats music I found on some of Destin Gerek’s Spotify playlists.  It’s a yummy vibe, vibrating in my chest and solar plexus.  Using deep, slow, measured breathing.  How long has it been since I really connected with my breathing?  Or my body?  Or presence?  Or felt the desire to just sit and be and write whatever thoughts and feelings come up?

Years.  It feels like years.

Years of having to focus on doing things for others – for my kids growing up, for my wife adjusting to living in a new country, for my financial security.  And recovery.

My adventurous heart still beats.  I bought a house in Pensacola, Florida and for the past year and a half I’ve been living a Jimmy Buffett escape lifestyle for a week to ten days every month.  It’s been expensive, taken a lot of time and energy, and life-changing, soul-opening. 

And it’s led to other things.  What else new and “out there” can I try, for me?  And what else?  Who is this guy who has been under wraps for so long, doing what needs to be done, taking care of things and living a confined life?

I rediscovered my love for fishing during the pandemic.  Then I massively expanded that love into a new adventure in Florida, living my best fishing/beach life ever.  I got to third degree black belt Taekwondo and then thought “what am I doing this for?” and took a huge step back.  Doing things just to do them or “because it’s good for me” doesn’t fit anymore.  Something’s changed in me and the routine doesn’t work.  Doing nothing feels better.

Doing nothing ain’t bad if you do it right.  Bring a little intention into it and that nothing becomes something.  Bring a little more of myself into that conscious nothing and suddenly I have a cool, chill lifestyle. 

And that brings me here.  Sitting on the couch, listening to some cool, sexy beats and just writing whatever shit comes out.  I’m not bored, just chill.  Not thinking about other things or what I should be doing, just chilling and letting it out, not thinking about what it means or trying to make it into something.

In fact I’m going deep into the not giving a shit about any of that.  Fuck trying to build anything or so something meaningful, I’m just sitting here chilling and writing about nothing and loving it.  I’m done complaining about California like I have no control over the situation.  I made my decision, the rest of the world can do whatever the fuck it wants, I don’t have to give a shit.  And right now, for once, I don’t, and it feels awesome.

I want to go deeper into this chill “not giving a shit,” let go of the angry, reactive anti-energy and just let go of giving a shit about anything, for me.  Let all that bullshit crumble and fall into the sea.  And we’ll see where this goes.

I feel a spiritual connection and a desire to further my practice, but embodied and natural, not the forced, formulaic shit.

Why is it I’m so much more deeply expressive on this blog, but the other one is mostly a picture blog?  It’s not bad, it’s just not a place where I express much in writing.  Do I still need this duality of expression?  Does that serve me?

Maybe I unconsciously feel like the “fish stories” are beneath the level of expression here?  But the Pensacola house experience and the “fish stories” have been life-altering and a spiritual awakening.  Maybe I need to stop being small in my expression and bring it all back home here, that the little Wordpress blog with little audience no longer really serves me?

I want to get really funky.  There are things out there that I was either afraid to try or which didn’t feel like me and now I see and feel myself enjoying that reality.  I want to get “out there,” get a little lost and maybe find a new home, find more of myself.

The Trump Landslide and the Spiritual Realignment

 My first response to the election was "WHAT A RELEIF!"  That was when I saw Florida had rejected the very stupid and evil initiatives to legalize pot and unlimited abortions.  When I saw Trump and Rick Scott won in a landslide, I was hopeful for what the rest of the country would do.

And then the landslide materialized.  And a sense of relief changed into a sense of spiritual realignment.

This has been going on since the summer when Biden was humiliated in the debate and Trump survived an assassination attempt.  That was where the forces of evil really showed themselves, and also where it was clear the Luciferian forces were dying.  

They ousted a duly-elected President (sorry, Trumpers, Biden won legit in 2020) who was also duly nominated, after spending years covering for his mental infirmities and outsourcing the Presidency to the Deep State.  

That was after they literally tried to kill Trump, and failed.  The "stand-down" orders that led to the shooting were from the top of the Deep State chain of command, as were the orders to the media to basically bury what was one of the most important events in a generation.  And the mainstream media buried it because they were complicit.

Everything that happened after that was the desperate flailings of the Luciferian elite.  The whole Kamala Harris "Joy" nonsense, the summer fake polling (Rasmussen did a great job exposing this fake - Trump was ahead by his winning % the entire election cycle), the trials, all desperation moves.

But this time, every move was countered by the forces of light.  Elon Musk refused to allow the media to manipulate the news and ended up becoming the most reliable source of news in the world.  He kept the Trump shooting story alive until they had to fire someone.  Eventually he supported Trump.

Then RFK, Jr. endorsed Trump right after the Dem convention, a brilliant counter that threw the elites off completely.  RFK Jr. got the last laugh - if you can't beat them, join the other team and beat them anyhow.  He ended up being the most consequential Democratic Party candidate of 2024.  Suck it, Fauci.

After that, everything fell into place and the wheels fell off for the Luciferian elite.  They even tried to campaign with Liz Cheney, the face of the most evil elements of the Republican Party, and had the ost evil people from Hollywood and the music industry at their rallies.  It was like they were gathering all the forces of evil together, so the forces of light wouldn't have to track them down one by one.  Thanks!   

The election was an affirmation (though a relief, since it gives Trump full power to dismantle their newtork), but the realignment happened earlier.

Other signs, the hurricane season, while severe for some, was still significantly weaker than all the predictions.  The oceans are realigning and the need for intense chaos is significantly less. We're seeing other signs, here on Earth and elsewhere.  The near-extinction of Hamas and Hezbollah, the economic collapse of China are other examples.

Where we go from here - there will be major world shifts, but less violent and disruptive than initially predicted.  China and Russia have basically no choice but to get in line and drop their expansionist agendas.  Look for a peace accord in Ukraine, the end of Iran nukes (and possibly the regime), North Korea suing for peace, and China making efforts to become a better world citizen. They really don't have a choice and they know it.

China will face a severe economic recession over the next 3-5 years which will diminish their influence.

Look for a global movement away from the "woke agenda," as the Luciferian power is now cut off from that agenda.  Look for a movement away from the insane and unhelpful "green agenda" toward something more balanced and sane ("all of the above").  Europe will have no choice but to go along, with the US and Asia calling the shots.  

False Light Matrix people will have a very hard time of it.  I see a lot more deaths and severe hardships in this group - it's already happening at a rapid rate.  I'd like to see them give up their ways and change, but they won't and I don't see any other path but literal extinction.  Their energy has been cut off and they know no other way.

Genuine light workers, on the other hand, will see a massive improvement in their life situation.  They've had a really hard time of it for years and years, but that's all changing.  The sources of the massive attacks are dying, so these people can finally build happy, normal, peaceful, prosperous lives.

I see a lot of prosperity emanating from the forces of light and raising a lot of boats.  Not everyone will benefit - those aligned with Lucifer will suffer tremendous economic and personal hardship.  Countries like Iran are going to suffer a lot more before they change and things get better.  But for "normies," things will finally get better, a LOT better.  

And that's where most of the real relief is coming from - the lifting of that massive energetic oppression that's been crushing us for years and years.  We can finally breathe and live our best lives.  And THAT is a very, very good thing.    

The New Reality and the Spiritual War: Kamala Can't Win

 I wrote before that there was a likely benefit to having Biden win so long as he was kept in check.  This was before we saw his full-blown dementia on display in the debate.  And then the coup that gave us Kamala Harris, and the complete BS PR game we've seen since then.

Harris wouldn't just be a bad President, and she certainly would, she would fully empower the Cabal.  It's no coincidence that evil Cabal members like Mark Cuban, Dick Cheney and so many others have rushed to endorse Harris - she's the Cabal's dream.  She's a literal empty suit, a willing puppet.  In fact, that seems to be her entire slogan - "Vote for me, I'm a puppet and I'll make you a puppet too!"

Bizarre how many people want to go along with being led by someone.  This goes for the Trump people and their cult as well, but the Harris "rule over me!" cult is a whole other level of gleeful self-oppression.

And that absolutely needs to be stopped.

I don't know if we're ever going back to something that looks like "normal" when it comes to politics.  I'm not even sure we want to try.  We need to move toward radical self-ownership.  There was a path to get there with Biden, but zero chance through Harris, so she absolutely needs to be rejected and rejected solidly and emphatically.

I still don't see Trump as the catalyst for the societal transformation humanity needs, but then again I don't see it coming from government leadership.  Complete government failure would be a blessing.  Complete government control would be a disaster, and that's what Harris and her handlers represent.

At this point, the best case scenario is Trump and his haters fight so viciously that government becomes completely dysfunctional and people are forced to look to themselves to deal with things.  That would set us on the path to evolution.  The more likely option, however, is war, economic collapse or social dysfunction, or some combination of the three, with natural disasters thrown in to really get things going.  And I see that happening with Trump and his successor.  

Harris' control structure would be like freezing American society in carbinite, which would give China free reign to do the same and evolution is delayed for generations (while wars and economic collapse still occur, the worst of both worlds).

Hurricane Meditation and Undoing Into Flow

 I'm meditating into the energy of the building current hurricane in the Gulf, flowing with and transmuting the energy.  Finding the flow.

It's been a process of establishing a new life and finding that flow, or letting that flow find me.  Things are different.  I knew they would be, but at the same time I didn't really know what that meant.  In the end, it means letting go, honoring my path and purpose and feeling into that energy flow.

As usual, I think far too much when it comes to establishing a new life path.  Some of this is necessary - I'm now living in two places on opposite sides of the country in more ways than geography.  I had to create a second living environment, and then deal with the realization that it's really my only living environment, as it's the only environment where I'm actually living.

Now the energies of my prior practice and this new established reality are merging and things are coming into focus.  I don't have to worry about things like money or making sure I have what I need, because I have what I need.  I don't have to force meditations, I'm beginning to understand that.  

I create intentions and then I allow the meditative and alchemy practice to build itself around that intention.  And then in the moments I least expect, energetic flow finds me.  I stop trying to attain something and feel into that energy and for those moments life becomes timeless and immortal.  

Now is when I understand why I'm taking the energies of the hurricane season and bringing them into my energy field, transmuting them.  It creates the energy and space to really flow.  

Aah, there's that inner peace.  There's that new-old-new reality, the creation and reconnection and birth and return of the Prodigal Son all in one.  

Now I understand why it's so important to create this home in Florida.  I mean, I loved it before this moment, but I'm beginning to feel into the deeper importance, the deeper flow and purpose.

Even looking at this screen saver picture of Pensacola Beach has a different feel and meaning.  

Some thoughts coming up now:

Life is eternal.  Life is short, but there is time.

Make good decisions.

Own your mistakes, don't let your mistakes own you.  This alone can sometimes be the difference between a good and bad decision.

Flow is a practice.  Sometimes you have to practice flow before you experience it.

The misses are as important as the hits.  It's all important.  But taking it too seriously doesn't help.

Avoid withdrawal and escape.  Solitude is beautiful if it is conscious. 

Don't force, flow, but gentle effort sometimes needs to be applied.

Experience is never an escape.  Escape is rarely an experience.  

Distant Healing Meditation Tonight

I'm offering a free distant healing meditation tonight at 9pm US Central time.  June 21, 2024.

It is available to anyone who chooses to receive.  Simply agree in your mind to receive the healing energy and it is yours.  There is nothing else to do.

I'm going to try to do these on a regular basis, but getting back into it today.