Into The Flow

Life is AWESOME!  I mean really awesome!

This week I faced some long-standing blocks and released them, opened up all this energy and today I’m at the end of the week and it’s just – fuck yah, life is fucking AWESOME!!

Knocked out twenty-plus pages for Destin, and a big chunk of my own book.  This is what happens when blocks dissolve.  And it’s like this everywhere, everything is freed up and flowing.  It’s SO good!!

And it doesn’t mean life is just all feel-good, it’s that the whole energetic container is getting bigger, there’s more energy, more power, more grounding, more flow.  I see the bullshit blocks in a whole new light, I can let go of ALL those blocks, and it feels SO good to be free from my own unnecessary worry and energy blocks. 

It’s why I do all this work – to clear up the blocks, open up the container, receive and produce, massively produce.  And yes, it’s fucking great when I have this FLOW.  I love to produce and create, but I have spent so much of my time and energy fighting through these blocks and just getting by, not having the energy to create and wondering if maybe I was wrong about my calling.  Then the blocks finally dissolve and I’m in my creation flow and – YES!  I’m home again!

During that long period of block, I would hold the image of myself in some beautiful environment, writing and creating, but my pleasure would come from the beauty and the relaxation, not the flow.  Here in that flow, it doesn’t matter where I am, the energy, the creation – that’s the pleasure.  I don’t know how I kept going when I was disconnected from this – paddling to keep my head above water and knowing it would get better someday.  But I did.  And I will again when I have those periods of resistance. 

And that is something particularly empowering – knowing I can keep my head above water during the down periods, knowing I’ll get through those blocks and flow again, it’ll be okay.  I’m very excited about this phase in my life and I expect it will impact this blog as well.  I’m feeling more focused and inspired in my writing and expression than I have in a very long time.  I’m emerging form the slog into a much more open place. 

Veil Lifting, Energy Expanding, Blocks Dissloving

The veil is dissolving. In fact it's almost entirely gone now. You can read some details from Etienne here:
https://www.spiritualselftransformation.com/blog/spiritual-transformation/consciousness-shift/the-removal-of-the-veil/

What does this mean?  It means a major infusion of awakening energy, which is going to create powerful shifts on a global level.  In fact we're already seeing many, not all good.  The shifts can be chaotic, painful, annoying, deadly, or incredible - or a combination of these things.

Take my personal "veil-lifting story."  I've gained massive attuning energy and energetic healing powers, but have had to move quickly and painfully through some long-standing energetic blocks that I was very attached to.  Here's a quick memo of what's been going on:

The veil is lifting and it’s bringing big movements into my life – huge movements.

The biggest one is that my wife’s visa has finally been approved today, and she’ll get her green card.  That’s a HUGE block that’s now out of the way.  Even though this was a foregone conclusion from the beginning, we were stuck in a holding pattern until it was officially resolved.  Now we can travel internationally, she can work and we can move forward with our lives.

On a smaller scale the last of my tax returns was approved and the refund deposited.  Also today.

And MASSIVE creation on both Destin’s book and my fiction, all week. 

All this on top of my removal of a HUGE internal block and attachment I didn’t even know was there, that was finally resolved by standing up for myself and fully asserting my boundaries. 

And another block in connection that was lifted with ease, also today.  This one seems to be the icing on the cake of what has become a complete reinvention of an essential aspect of my life.  It’s clear looking at it now that the issues I was having were because I was transitioning from one reality to another and there was too much of the “old energy” attached to the connection.  Now it’s from this clean place and there is all this spaciousness and none of the ego issues.  Wow, night and day!

Throw in the powerful coaching session I created this past weekend and that’s a lot of breakthroughs.

Everything I’m seeing in my reality is confirming Metatron’s message – living in clarity, free from distortions, is a powerful reality beyond the limits of what I thought was possible.  Because what I thought was possible was the distortion.  My distortions have been negative and self-imposed.  And that negative reality was so strong at one point I was literally training people to go along with it. 

So yes, I created all the problems in my life.  And I created a whole lot of imaginary problems to go on top.  And then I’d worry about thing that weren’t there.  That’s a lot of distortion.  And the shadows of that distortion are still out there – the critics, the haterz, all a product of my own distortions.

When I choose to take of the lens, the power is limitless.  And it’s an adjustment, there’s actually a lot of stress in choosing freedom and personal power.  I’ve been very attached to that disempowering distortion.  And at the same time there is some reassurance – it was never the world against me, it was always me against myself. The haterz are a reflection of my own self-loathing.  Everything that’s happened I’ve brought upon myself – which means when I stop attacking myself, it goes away. 

Now I feel the awakening energy pouring in…. mmmm…. Powerful. 

But throughout this period, I was experiencing tremendous stress, sleepless nights, massive worry and psychic trauma.  Because, even with all the work I've done, I've been carrying incredible resistance and attachment to lower vibrations, particularly anger, worry, fear and pride (shame, embarrassment, right-fighting).  It took everything I've done and all that energy and trauma to finally "pop the cork" and let all that crap go.

The part about me realizing the enemy was always within - I fought this for YEARS. I literally created my enemies to give me an excuse to hold onto these attachments.  And I suffered mightily in finally getting past it. And if I'm going through that kind of trauma, imagine what others will face.

So I'm in a great place.  My energy is elevating, I'm elevating the energy of people all around me in ways I didn't know I could before.  I let go of all that internal shit and feel great.  But anyone who tells you this transition is all sweetness and light and we'll all be holding hands and singing folk music in the sunshine is delusional.  This is not a fun period for humanity, and it'll get much worse before it gets better.

Yes, I'm thrilled my blocks are disappearing.  But that just means more work ahead.  Because the world is going to need a LOT of help.

Updates From the Lifting of the Energetic Veil

 

The energy coming off this is so strong and clean.  I picked up this bracelet in Thai Town Saturday and attuned it over the weekend.  I wonder if the lifting of the veil is causing crystals to activate at even higher vibrations. All my crystals are vibrating very, very high. 

I’m told jade is my stone, compatible with my birthday.  The energy is definitely good now with the bracelet.  And these stones are “raining energy” – reactivated them.  It’s a lot of strong energy.

I had a very powerful coaching session with a client, guiding him through an energetic cord-cutting meditation Sunday.  It was a great session for him, and impactful for me as well – I experienced many energetic shifts from the coaching experience as the coach.

His issue was cutting the energetic cords with his mom, which is an issue for all men it seems.  It’s a challenging aspect of our work as men, so I’m glad I can do my part to help. 

This happened at the same time I was in the middle of massive creative output for Destin’s book as well as my fiction book.  A lot going on. 

Meanwhile, my energy has been calling me to “stand my ground” and assert my boundaries.  This has led me through some stressful days and feelings of anger and anxiety, but it was long overdue. I’m standing up to the big “bully’ in my life – who really isn’t a bully, but someone I’ve given away my power to again and again.  With this energy elevation, my higher self is having none of that and demanding firm boundaries and respect for my space and expression.

Going through that has felt stressful.  My system is very unaccustomed to this kind of setting and sitting in firm boundaries, as opposed to being reactive and accommodating.  But every time my habits would pull me toward compromise, my higher self would insist on asserting myself.  And in the end it felt good.  Yes, very stressful going through it, and I’m sure the conflict isn’t over, but this is right.  I feel good about myself in a way I haven’t, I’ve released a huge energetic block.  And I’ve kept the jerk in my life from dumping her baggage into my energetic space. 

I have to trust this process – my energy is elevating at a rapid rate, but it looks different than other people, because my blocks and challenges are different.  But look at the weekend – highest energetic attunement powers ever, incredible energy and coaching experience, MASSIVE creative output in a short period of time, and removing a very large and stubborn block in my energy.

That’s a REALLY good weekend!

Yes, it came with energy-induced sleep issues, some stress going against the grain of my patterns, and it didn’t “feel good.”  I’m fatigued, dizzy, unsettled in my energy.  And it’s an insanely powerful experience!  Awakening isn’t supposed to “feel good,” it’s supposed to do good.  And this is doing a whole lot of good.  I’m moving powerfully toward truth, expression and freedom and away from unhealthy patterns. 

That’s a sign that the veil is lifting.  Feeling lightness and happiness while my world stays stuck in the same patterns is not movement, it’s energetic masturbation.  It’s the escapism that plagues the New Age community. Change is tough.  Choosing freedom and full expression of truth is not easy.  That’s the whole point – if it was easy we wouldn’t need higher vibrations of energy to get there, everyone would just do it and world would be great.  Obviously we’re not there, and the faster I can move along my path the more I can do to help in the transition.

Re Worry and Anger

Okay I see what's going on. The veil is lifting and my energetic system is struggling with the energy. The sudden raising of vibration to massive heights is causing an overload and the worry/ anger pattern is an attempt to diffuse the energy, to moderate the transition. 

And it sucks! I hate worrying and being angry. But once I realize it's not the story I though it was I can deal with it and resume my energetic growth. 

Refocusing and Anchoring to Dissolve Blocks

Stories have limited value.  I truly believe we, and I place myself right there in that group, spend far too much time chasing our stories about why we’re doing or feeling this or that.  Somehow we believe if we just understand and value our story enough, it’ll change.

Except it never does.  In fact, that process just entrenches the story even deeper.

At some point we need to decide what’s more important – our attachment to our story or our commitment to growth.

Etienne Charland goes over this very “high-level,” and I think he has a hard time understanding the practical psychic element most of us have to go through in order to remove those energetic blocks and be more effective.  He’s able to resolve a lot energetically (or he just never experienced those things, so it never came up for him), so many may feel left behind – they can’t just “undo” everything energetically and poof-no more problems.

Sometimes we can.  More often we need more practical steps to get through the transition. 

It’s a matter of shifting the story.  Where our attention goes, our energy flows.  So if we keep engaging with the block, nothing will change.  But if we shift focus, we can eliminate the block and then the energy flows freely.

I’ve had some blocks over the past few years that manifest in different ways – worry, irritation, etc.  There are stories, but again, at some point one has to decide if they want to live in stories of live their truth.  Because you can’t do both.

So take a step back.  The story is the excuse for the unhelpful energetic pattern.  It may feel real, but it’s just story.  So disengage and see it for what it is.

Then refocus.  Deep breathing, connecting to earth.  And conscious connection to something else. I have a few periods I can go back to – the recent feeling of freedom during my vacation, recent energetic work with Etienne, times in Thailand, and this period in 2012 right after doing some deep work with Destin.  So anchor those all in, that’s the reconnect. 

Anchor – go back and actually feel the sensations during those high points.  Then hear a sound, visualize a picture and create a touch anchor.  Keep doing this until you can fire the anchor and access the feeling.  Keep going back until the anchor is strong. 

Then every time the old pattern begins, catch yourself and fire the anchor.  After time you’ll catch it earlier and earlier in the pattern until the feeling replaces the old pattern.  This can be used with energetic alchemy to zap the bad energy and create a new framework, so they can work in conjunction. 

A couple things:  this requires a certain amount of patience and self-acceptance.  You have to accept that you have these imperfect patterns.  Then you have to be patient enough to allow the change to happen, because it can take time.  I don’t believe energy work and more “practical” pattern changes have to be mutually exclusive.  In fact they work well together and enhance each other. 

Thoughts After a Week in the Wilderness (And a Flat Tire)

Another day post-vacation and integrating everything, clearing out my work inbox, getting things set straight, now relaxing at the tire shop.

Yes, after a treacherous drive up and down the mountain I popped a tire picking up pizza three blocks from home.  That’s neither good nor bad luck, it just is.  It’s an opportunity for greater presence.

This has been an amazing integration.  I feel all the old BS stripping away.  But man, my ego was holding onto that crap tightly.  And still is.

The value of being highly opinionated, which I have clearly held, appears to be a reflection of a distortion of low self-esteem in some aspect.  Perhaps the value of opinions is a defense against being gullible.  If I hold onto preset opinions that are mine, then I can’t be fooled.  Obviously this is a losing strategy.

And really my opinions serve me little. Opinions and preferences have caused me tremendous stress as well as conflict and social disconnection.

As I integrate my powers and clear out the internal distortions, a new truth emerges that is higher than my opinions and ego.  I can move through many opinions and feel strong and solid in who I am and what I’m doing.

Ego-based “rightness,” however logically and factually sound, is still ultimately a limiting belief.  It is a need for the ego to receive recognition and validation from others. And that validation is fleeting.  Once the ego feels validated, the disconnection returns and the cycle of needing validation resumes.

This isn’t to say “don’t hold opinions and preferences,” as that’s not possible and leads to other ego-based issues (“look at me I’m so unattached to preferences, so fucking indifferent”).  It is about placing value on higher truth.  In this case, my higher truth means consciously letting go of the value I’ve placed on opinions and preferences that are not serving my higher truth. 

This may seem like a faint distinction or a half-measure.  But it’s very clear and strong when it’s embodied.  I’m returning from my vacation and looking at all the opinions that brought up emotional reaction.  Instead of acting on the opinion, this is an opportunity to inquire about the emotional reaction and engage in deeper healing.

Now, this is not a simple process.  I’m aware that my brain is addicted to the emotional chemicals.  My worrying is very disruptive but also creates chemicals my brain likes and wants more of.  Anger is addictive.  The “gambling hormones” are addictive.

But here’s the thing – a lot of my patterns are compensating.  This is the great thing about looking at everything in my life from this “new me,” I’m looking at every pattern in the moment and looking at it against my “true self.” I’ve done this throughout my journey, so for the past 6-7 years since I began in earnest.

What’s different now?  There isn’t a conflict between “what I want” and “what’s my higher truth.”  Instead there’s an awareness and an INSTANT shift.  I notice the emotional pattern, notice the disconnect with the truth, and I lose all interest in that pattern I used to hold onto with everything I had. That’s how I know I’ve changed. 

Even things like – “I popped my tire – this is bad luck.  No wait, it’s good luck.  No wait, that’s me assigning meaning to an event.  It just is.  Now what am I going to do about it?”  Poof, emotional pattern – GONE. 

I used to make meanings and then integrate them into my work – this happened, that means something about my work.  That’s gone too.  I can separate energetic events from confirmation bias.

I had written this before, but I keep coming back to it because it’s going to color the way I set up my “Thailand spiritual retreat.”  On this trip, I was doing something I love with the people I care about, free from other distractions and radiating with the energetic activation.  This formula created the complete shift. 

This is the experience I want to give people who visit my sanctuary, when I am able to bring that into the world.  I want them to have that energetic and physical experience that leaves them truly observing their ego and able to make the real changes in their lives going forward.  To activate and embrace their energetic power, releasing the ego blocks in the way. 

I want to create an experience where people are free from the lives they had before they arrived, yet enjoy a level of comfort and pleasure that makes the Thailand spiritual retreat enjoyable, instead of feeling like a painful sacrifice.

I want to bring this element into my coaching as well – find a way to strip out the life that’s going on to discover what is truly important.

There is a small circle of people that truly matter to me.  And there is a small circle of things that are truly important.  The rest is either a means to that end (making money, for example) or unnecessary distraction, attachment or distortion.

And literally everything I’m worrying about, that’s been keeping me up at night, falls into the “not important” column.  So it’s a matter of shifting my focus to what is important and moving my attention back there whenever I feel myself pulling away into worry.  And it’s often worry about what people think of me – people whom at my heart I don’t care about in the slightest.  And now I can stop worrying and let go.

Not that this will automatically happen, but the training process is in place, moving my attention to what it important and away from what isn’t.  And it comes at the time when I’ve massively expanded my energy.  And it’s at a time when I’m ready to create a new me and let go of the old unhelpful energies and thought patterns, so this is good.

And again, it comes down to the simple question – is this thing important and relevant to me?  And if not, what is that would be a better use of my attention and energy?  Which brings me back to the tire shop, and this – reflecting and integrating the lessons instead of trying to find meaning in a flat tire or getting worked up over cost, inconvenience, or the people yelling at each other on the news channel on the waiting room TV.

"Raining" Crystal Energy

I've learned a new way from Etienne to make the crystal energy more powerful. I took the crystal energy, liquified it, then heated it into steam which then become clouds that rain the energy down. 

After doing it with these crystals, they're now much lighter and the energy flows through the room more completely. Very cool technique.