The Empty House Vision

I have this recurring dream/ vision that I’m in a completely empty house.  There’s not a piece of furniture or anything else in it.  It’s spotless – clean, the air is crystal clear, the temperature is a steady, moderate temperature everywhere.  And there is nobody there, nothing there, just an empty building.

Sometimes a guide brings me there and then she leaves.  The last time there was a guide, she looked like the Thai singer Palmy.  Sometimes I just show up.

Outside is an empty desert – just nothing.  Not hot, not cold, just open and empty.

I get the message that I can create whatever I want, but I don’t know how.  How do I generate what I want from nothingness?  So I feel stuck there, like I’m trapped in a void.  It feels empty, lonely.

The slate is clean, my life is whatever I want to make of it and I can’t make a damn thing.  And there’s nothing there.  And the feeling of emptiness seems to go on forever.

So all the bad stuff is gone, but then there’s nothing but me and I’m alone.

Shouldn’t I know how to create something from nothing?  Shouldn’t I be able to draw from the infinite power of the universe?  But there’s just nothing.

And there’s no backstory.  Am I dead?  Was I transported there? Did something happen?  Where is everyone else? 

That is a big worry of mine, that everything I’m doing will end up being for nothing, that this is all a big waste of time in the end.  It gets to the heart of my lack of belief in some of the spiritual aspects I’m engaged in – what if in the end it’s all bullshit?

I can’t shake that, this feeling of limbo. I do these things, I test them to be accurate, and I still worry that it’s all bullshit.

I test:  my spiritual pursuits are all bullshit – false.

My spiritual pursuits are true and accurate – true.

My doubts are valid and real – true.

So I really am in some state of limbo – I’m drawn to a certain pursuit, but I don’t see the point and can’t bring my physical and emotional self to align and accept this as reality.  The dualistic spiritual concept I grew up with is false, but the alternative seems like some lame science fiction novel.  

Things are happening that point to some higher spiritual path, but right now it just feels empty and lonely and a big waste of time.

I haven’t broken through to the physical and emotional levels yet.  I’m still working through internal conflicts and feel kind of lost.

So I guess the empty house is really where I’m at right now.  I’ve cleared out the falsehoods but have yet to receive the truth.  This is not a fun place to be.

Premonition: Calamity?

I had a very vivid and disturbing dream the other night that I confirmed is a vision.  It was rather shocking, so I’m disclosing it to get the information out. There is further information to follow.

In the dream, people were reporting their friends a loved ones dying in alarming numbers, probably three fourths of the population I could see was dead from some disease.  Many of those still alive were suffering under delusions that their loved ones were alive, but I knew they had perished.  I saw no point in telling them the truth and they wouldn’t listen anyway.

Apparently there was some meeting going on where the survivors were talking and trying to assess the situation. It appeared that the authorities had no control over anything, probably because they were decimated beyond the ability to function.  So total chaos and anarchy and massive depopulation.

I looked outside and this wall of black fog with thick white lightning in it was moving across the land and heading toward me.  I had this feeling that there was nothing that could be done at this point and I didn’t know if there would be anyone left (or anything left to live for if there were any survivors). 

That’s when I woke up.

I was compelled to meditate, clear my energy, and discuss the situation with the archetypes.  I confirmed that, yes this was a vision, not my own crazy dream. 

But I got some more news – yes, it was a vision.  Yes, it was a scene of things to come.  And, by sharing this vision with the archetypes, I had altered the timeline so that this outcome was no longer inevitable. 

I went to sleep again and had another vision – this one of people who had survived the calamity.  They were very happy.  There were fewer people and things were kind of a mess, but there was also a lot more freedom and massive prosperity, massive abundance.  And it was like a giant weight had been lifted off everyone’s shoulders.  I didn’t get the sense people were mourning, so either most people made it out okay or those who were lost weren’t worth mourning. 

I confirmed this was also a vision, and accurate.

So what I’m coming away with is that a massive change event is either taking place or will be taking place.  One possible timeline – near or complete destruction of all life – has been averted.  But the transformation is coming.  It will be a massive shift in economics, society and government.  There will likely still be pretty substantial physical destruction, but when it’s done people won’t mind. 

The end result will be a massive freedom – it’ll be euphoric.  The current structures that impose on us will be gone.  The internal social conditionings that cause so much constraint and misery will be gone.  There will be abundance everywhere, a destruction of attachments and limits, and an explosion of genuine widespread happiness.

I get the sense some people will perish, but they will be the ones hopelessly attached to the oppressive, limiting, unhappy paradigm we currently live in.  So not only will they not be missed, but I get the sense the rest of the world will be extremely happy to see them and everything they stand for expunged from the earth.  There will be very little if any collateral damage or innocent lives taken, it will be a very quick and precise act, and the change will be like being magically transported to another world.

The changes will not only be external but internal – we will change. Our perspective, thought patterns, attachments, patterns and habits will change.  Everything will change.

And it’s going to happen soon. 

So crisis averted, change imminent. 

Vision: "Queen Yoni" and the New Civilization

I was feeling very unstable energetically this morning.  It’s settled out as I’ve gone through my alchemy meditations and reconnected with my heart energy.  But something’s amiss.  I’ve been suffering some energetic attacks and had a vision dream last night that was a little disturbing.

Dark forces eradiated an entire group of people but I was able to protect the Queen Yoni (yah it looked like a very large disembodied yoni).  I recruited dulas and caretakers whose sole job was to take care of Queen Yoni, deliver the babies produced by Yoni (who would repopulate the lost tribe) and tend to the protected space. 

Dark forces returned to check on their handiwork.  I surprised them and destroyed all of them (barely), so the yoni and new generation were safe.  Now I was setting to work establishing and improving the conditions of the area from a corner of a room to a more suitable building, with plans for an altar, temple and organizational structure to raise, educate, house and integrate the next generation until it could take care of itself – a rather energetically tedious yet necessary task and one I intended to delegate, except for the oversight and advisory aspects, as soon as I felt comfortable things were the way they should be.

At one point I called on Etienne to provide high-level energetic assistance and he expressed frustration at such a seemingly mundane task.  I reminded him I was rebuilding a tribe the dark forces had extinguished, that this yoni was sacred, even if it seemed unremarkable, and anyhow the work I was asking for was “high level” and not at all beneath him.  And, finally, if it was too much trouble, he could teach me and I’d take care of everything from then on without his help, which he agreed to do, seeing that there were likely other extinguished civilizations that I could help resurrect in a similar way and he wanted no part of such endeavors (not because they weren’t worthy, but because he had much different things he needed to do and couldn’t be stuck in one place for any length of time). 

It was at that point I woke up, feeling this was indeed a vision, and a pretty accurate one at that, at least on an energetic level.  I had felt called to work again with Etienne, as I’m going to need help getting to the energetic level I need to be to fulfill my ever-expanding purpose and expression.

Last night I had an epiphany about accepting new healers and teachers, even with their flaws, and using my resources to help them do their best, and simply accept their flaws and let go of my attachment to energetic perfection, both in myself and others.  “Let people be people,” as my higher self is saying.  So this vision, however odd it may seem on a literal and physical level, appears accurate.  I’m looking for Etienne to give me the energetic resources to protect and develop the new tribe.

Queen Yoni, in the form in the vision, represents both the mundane, earthly child-bearing and rearing, and the divine promise of a new world created from earthly beings.  It’s the enlightened realization that the building of a new world involves both high-level energies and magic and a lot of rather tedious and mundane work.  But I find a lot of joy and satisfaction in this aspect – I was perfectly happy taking on that role while bringing in more people to free me for more executive tasks.

This fits with my vision for working with Etienne, how it relates to my own family life, my career path, and my vision for working with Destin.  And I realize it’s not “low-level” work, there are aspects that require high-level energy, but that’s not where I will be playing most of the time.   

The uneasiness is likely due to energetic attacks, which also came up in visions that I cannot remember.  Also external energetic attacks (my neighbors seem to be very much affected by things going on, to the point they’re regularly fighting now). 

There is also resistance related to unresolved personal issues – some blocks and resistance and unprocessed hurt.  I had a major heart awakening last night the melted a lot of negative programming, but also opened up other challenges perhaps I wasn’t expecting.

A lot of things are opening up – there’s movement now on my wife’s visa application, that had been energetically stuck for months.  Resolution of many “stuck” internal issues.  It’s a big deal.  But moving into this new role is not at all just fun and games.  It’s going to involve some big changes and challenges.