Gratitude, Perspective and Dealing With Unpleasant Feedback

I’ve been slammed at work and with energetic attacks today.  I’ve been mulling over a “Heavy” article I want to publish.  In the meantime, I’ve been receiving a lot of feedback on my “Confessions of a Narcissist” article.  I’ve been blown away by the tremendous support I’ve received, both from friends and people I don’t know.

In this work, what makes my day isn’t so much hearing “I enjoy reading your stuff.”  Don’t get me wrong, I appreciate readers who enjoy my writing and I like the positive feedback very much.  I’m grateful for all my readers.  But what really impacted me was the number of people who told me they resonated with my share, how it impacted them and helped them to move through their own experience. 

Because that’s what this is about for me – making an impact.  I had a couple people tell me how they’d been labeled with the “N-word” and went through their own process of reflection.  In hearing their stories and their process of reflection, it’s clear to me this word is being thrown about rather recklessly.  These people are so NOT sociopathic – in fact they’re doing more work to show up as a positive force in the world than 99% of the people out there, most likely including their former partners who are busy pointing fingers.

So I’m honored that my experience is helping other good people in their own journey to betterment.  Thank you.  I gave up blogging when I felt like I wasn’t doing anything positive, that nobody cared.  In looking back, the times my blogging felt disconnected was when I was moving away from my truth and talking out of my ass, or when I devolved into gossip or flame-throwing.  More than ever, it’s critical I stay focused on my purpose.

And I realize I’m not at all alone as being someone whose been handed a serious label and engaged in some deep reflection.  I’m grateful for that process, and I highly encourage every person who is serious about awakening and evolving to take every opportunity to shine light on their shadows, to look fearless into every corner of themselves.

At the same time, I feel compelled to also offer some perspective.  Don’t beat yourself up because someone gave you a label.  That label isn’t you, it’s that other person’s shadow being thrown at you.  If someone calls you a sociopath, and your first response is to inquire within and seek to grow and better yourself, you’re NOT a sociopath – in fact you’re probably light years ahead of most people in terms of growth.

These reflections aren’t about taking other people’s crap.  In relationships that don’t work out, there are always two people responsible (unless it’s a poly relationship, in which case it’s the number equal to the number in the relationship, but let’s not complicate things).  The minute one person decides to blame the other and assume victim status, that person has decided to stop growing.  Just because someone accuses you of being something doesn’t mean you need to do anything with that except treat it as feedback. 

Feedback is useful (to some degree or other); labels are bullshit.  If you catch yourself pointing fingers, that’s your bullshit and you need to cut that out and look at what you’re avoiding.

The best advice I can give when faced with a hopelessly judgmental ex is, first, disengage completely.  Stay away from the toxic crap.  Second, understand it’s the other person’s shadow – this person is processing their own disappointment and suffering and is not perfect.  Third, gain understanding – both of yourself (reflecting on the feedback) and your former partner.  Seek to find that place where you can accept that we are all on our path and doing the best we can.  We are all imperfect and a relationship that doesn’t work out is not a failure unless you refuse to learn from it. 

So reflect fearlessly, take full responsibility, make the changes to create the life you truly want, but don’t take other people’s crap.  At the end of the day, don’t beat yourself up – simply choose a better path and start walking.

And know you’re not alone.  This has been a big awakening for me, and I’m sure it is for many others.  There are many other good people walking a similar path – no matter how isolated you feel, we are all connected.

And thank you again for reminding me why I’m doing this work.

With Love,

Uthaithani

Q&A: Energy Readings; Thoughts About Where I'm At

Question:

I've followed and read the "Readings" you have done for men. Can you please tell me what these reading are and how you've come about doing them? I am intrigued.

Answer:

Thanks for your inquiry!

Recently I had a very profound third-eye awakening (actually overall energetic awakening on many levels).  Shortly after this Destin put out the call for men to ask for feedback and I engaged in a couple energy readings as feedback for men with whom I didn’t have a personal relationship, basically to offer something of value toward the task.

The feedback was very positive, in that men were saying they received a lot of value from the readings.   And I have found providing the readings to be valuable for me to exercise and sharpen this awareness aspect.  So I expanded and now offer a free reading to every man in EMP.

So it’s become an opportunity for me to practice giving readings while offering something of value to the group (since it’s difficult for me to join the events).

I wrote a brief description on an earlier post, but essentially the reading involves centering, grounding and connecting to my higher self.  Then I connect with the energy from a recent photograph (since it’s a distant reading) and take a picture in my mind’s eye of the energetic impression.  Then I’ll go about writing my reading.

I’ve noticed as I’ve been diving deeper into this aspect of my awareness that more subtle aspects are coming into my awareness, such as colors and awareness of implants and spiritual entanglements.  (It’s an ongoing process with massive potential for development, I’m just getting started.)

Let me know if you have any other questions.

Personal Thoughts and Impressions:

I’ll admit I’m still working through massive amounts of self-doubt and expectations of how things are supposed to be and supposed to work.  I recall the times what I believed was my intuition was in fact a misjudgment of emotion and ended up doing me and many others tremendous disservice.

I’m also expecting a certain amount of resistance, especially as my newfound expression collides with some old disempowering relationship paradigms. 

So I’m sensitive to inquiry when my higher self is welcoming it.  So there’s some painful unprocessed values conflicts going on.

So what’s going on is some fear and self-doubt and a higher knowing this is evidence I am on the right path.  So there’s calm and conflict.  I realize in the end this is where I am meant to be – to notice these places of inner conflict and resolve them.

Updates:  My ability to differentiate energetic vibration from personal preference and assumption is growing stronger.  I noticed last night I could “taste” energy, as I posted last night.  This has grown stronger and sharper.

In addition I can read people’s energy apart from visual preferences.  This is a powerful new epiphany and one that can guide me into a much more authentic way of being.  For example, I noticed an older woman whose energy was glowing and beautiful, and I was able to see that energy and value that apart from assumptions about her physical appearance and social paradigms.  This is a giant step in my growth.