Sex Magic is Fucking MAGICAL! How I SUPERCHARGED my Entire Life (In about a month)

The alchemy is running deeper, more earthy, sensual and embodied in its energetic expression.  The rituals and lessons becoming more edgy, more sexual.

More Tantric.

The driving force in my current evolutionary arc is sexual energy – the powerful, orgasmic life force energy that super-charges creative flow, confidence, vitality and personal transformation. 

It’s also crazy good for energizing higher-level alchemy and energetic connection and healing… and other kinds of energetic expression.

This, along with the cleansing power of the Teal Flame, has been supercharging my growth these past couple months.  Unbelievable breakthroughs – building out a whole new life for myself, making massive lifting gains at the gym, jumping into a yoga practice, writing whole novels in a matter of months, supercharged confidence and allll kinds of other goodies, stacking on top of one another in beautiful flow since March.

And the major catalyst for this explosion in transformation has been Sex Magic.  For those not familiar with Sex Magic, I’ll point you to Layla Martin’s podcast on the subject

I’ll take you through the process I use, which has some twists and variations, depending on how you want to calibrate it.  And I invite you to dive in and find your own way that works.

Some questions that come up that I’ll get out of the way first:

Do I need a partner?  No, you don’t, though a partnered sex magic experience can amplify the energy.

Do I need to directly touch myself?  No, and maybe.  It’s certainly possible to derive the orgasmic energy without any stimulation, but this might be a challenge for many without some kind of benchmark.  I’ll say this much – ANY sexual energy, that arousal sensation, is orgasmic energy and will work just fine for this practice.

Do I need to be fully aroused/ full orgasm?  No, you don’t.  As I said, any arousal energy will do the trick.  Obviously, more energy works better, but only if it aids the ritual and doesn’t become a distraction.    But as you practice more you can play with holding more and more energy.  It’s like any other exercise, start small and build up and you might be surprised at what you can do in a short time.

Can I be clothed? Again, yes.  Though you should aim to have a private space for yourself to do this ritual.

Create a quiet, private ritual space in a way that feels comfortable, sensual, relaxing and enjoyable for you.  Bring in anything that aids in this – candles, aroma, music, maybe sensual items.  You can take this as far as you want, but when starting keep it simple.

Begin with the intention:  Create your intention.  Make it one thing.  Make it as clear and tangible as you can.  Now fully picture it as best you can with all five senses – what it looks like, sounds like, smells like, feels like and tastes like.  Get every sense involved as vividly as you can.

And if you feel like you can’t find them all, fill up as much of the experience as you can with what you can – feel all of what you can feel.  Or sense.  Or imagine you can sense.

Now begin to bring your arousal energy into the intention.  Build this energy until you have as much as you can hold while maintaining your intention. 

Now begin to bring this arousal energy to your chakras, starting with your root chakra. 

A basic description of the chakras can be found here.

As you bring the energy up your chakras, visualize each color and feel the arousal energy increasing. 

Go from the root to sacral.  From sacral to solar plexus. From solar plexus to heart.  From heart to throat.  From throat to third eye.  From third eye to crown and as you move to crown you’re at “peak arousal.”

Here, allow the energy to permeate all your chakras and your entire body.  Bring forth your intention and make it as vivid as possible, using all five senses.  Infuse your intention with the peak sexual energy.  Feel it in the present moment. 

Continue this for as long as you can hold the energy and your intention, to lock in the pleasure and energy with your intention.

Then relax and breathe slow, deep breaths as your system returns to center.  And then calmly go about your day.

Later before you go to sleep, meditate briefly and access the memory of that energy and that intention to anchor it in.  When you wake, do the same thing – access the memory of that energy and the intention, to bring it forward into you daily experience.

If you want to “lock this in,” do this same ritual with the same intention for three days.  This locks the sex magic and the intention into your neurology.  After that, you won’t need to continue doing this as its wired in.

During the next three weeks after that, notice where your thoughts and senses move you and become attuned to that sense.  Your body will naturally align you toward your intention, which may ask you to do things outside your normal patterns.  Follow that.

And as you expand your cultivation practice, you can play with expanding Sex Magic to deepen your work and improve your results.  If you have crystals that help you with alchemy and meditation, you can integrate these with your practice.  You can add other elements that work for you – sounds like singing bowls, tapping, if that works for you.  The energy can massively enhance any practice you’re already doing, and probably inspire whole new practices you hadn’t considered. 

As I said, this is magical.  Be prepared for some truly incredible, life-changing results.  I can’t overstate what a tremendous change it has made in my own life over a very short time frame – and I’ve done a lot of “work” over many years.  This is pure gold.

Not to mention, it’s fun work, and will massively uplevel in your own Tantric and sexual experience along the way.

If this resonates, try it for three days and let me know what starts rocking in your world.

How Checking Out In Front of the TV Clarified My Views on Masculinity

 My current path has been moving strongly out of “hibernation” and into activity and major evolution.  It’s been a lot of internal and external changes, including getting more “buff” from the gym. 

And it’s led me to points where my system feels it’s “too much/too fast” and pushes back, insists that I take it easy.  And I listened – I’ll listen for a while anyhow, a little rest and chill is good. So I flipped on some streaming.

Tried “Principles of Pleasure” for about ten minutes.  The “intersectional” and trans agendas weren’t serving me at all, so I ditched it.  I found a documentary on the “Manosphere,” which seemed interesting.

It was disappointing.  Mostly because Louis Theroux decided to make it a documentary about Louis Theroux instead of actually looking into the phenomenon with real curiosity.  What kind of men are attracted to the “Manoshpere”?  He doesn’t seem to care, he just dismisses them. 

He discusses their message, but only so far as he can do a “gotcha.”  But what is their message, and what about it resonates with so many young men today?  He doesn’t know, he doesn’t care.  Great documentary, wanker.

When I watch these things, I look for the value – what about this can be of value and service to me?  What can align with or clarify my vision?  There are aspects of the “Manoshpere” the resonate – focus on physical fitness and strength training, placing  a high value on masculine power and leadership, however imperfect their interpretation might be. 

And they are successful. Yes, a lot of them are grifters and that’s a problem.  But Justin Waller is a legitimate successful businessman.  There’s no dismissing that.  They’ve done well in their own way.  And you can argue with their morals or model but you can’t argue with success. 

So there are some positive things there.  You don’t have to support OnlyFans or like their podcast model, or even agree with much of what they say to recognize there is real value.  And there is no denying they have a following.  And that following has some commonalities.

They have clearly tapped into a crisis of masculinity.  A lot of young men are lacking any kind of male leadership in their lives.  These are men who are raised mostly (or entirely) by their mothers.  They were taught in school almost entirely by women teachers.  Maybe in high school they got into a sport and found a good male coach and some older young men who could mentor, but they’ve spent most of their lives trying to figure it out on their own.

The problem with the “Manoshpere” is it substitutes real male mentorship with grift and easy answers.  It provides little if any foundational work.  It’s a bypass, which is very attractive to people who feel lost.  There are a lot of bypasses out there.  Some lost boys join Antifa.  Some lost boys subvert their masculinity in hopes the girls will like them and they’ll be accepted (on someone else’s terms).  Some lost boys join the “Manosphere” and develop angry, reactive patterns around women.

Getting back to the documentary, while the “bros” don’t provide a great model for masculinity, it’s better than the “soy boy” model Theroux offers.  And ten minutes of “listening to women” talk about their grievance agenda was my week’s quota of torture.

So, no, weak weenie “woke” men and feminist women are not part of the solution to the crisis of masculinity. The left has no answers, since it literally created the problem in the first place and is too stubborn and arrogant to do any soul-searching. (Plus its model is about controlling people, and personal sovereignty is their enemy.)

So, yes, the “bros” are very imperfect.  But “listening to women” is not going to connect men to their masculine core.  And listening to men who went down the “listening to women” path isn’t any better. (There’s a place for that listening, but after a man has connected to his masculine core and can relate to women from a place of strength and partnership.)

Some of the things the “bros” say is accurate.  Women have no interest in men being successful, in fact it goes against their interest.  In order for a man to find his masculine core and be successful as a man, he needs to separate from women and find his own identity, free from any influence of women. This is an essential aspect of developing into manhood.

“Go your own way?”  Not so much.  Men need community.  A gym is better than nothing, but there are alternatives.  Telling men to forge their path alone is cult/grifter messaging. It’s separating and isolating someone to take advantage. 

Raging against perceived systematic oppression (“the matrix”) is horseshit.  It’s as annoying when it’s leftist women or right-wing men and it serves nobody.

But while the pattern is unhealthy, there is an element of truth that, if followed, can lead to finding that masculine core.  And that’s learning to differentiate between external programming and your personal sovereignty.  Learning to undo all of those patterns and beliefs from society, from women, from soy boys, from the media, from grifters, and everyone else and learning to differentiate from “what is someone else’s voice” and “what is my own voice.”

Now that practice is gold.  That process will transform a confused man-boy into a real man, standing in his own power, who can relate to women and the world from a place of sovereignty. 

And this process isn’t about complaining about feminists or soy boys.  It’s about noticing.  It’s about getting quiet, instead of getting angry.  It’s about really listening – to yourself, to everyone around you.  It’s about learning to feel into yourself – not your emotional reactions, but you inner sense, to recognize who you really are.  To learn to separate the bullshit outside, and even more importantly the bullshit inside, from your core self and your truth.

When you begin to understand that both the “Manosphere” and its critics are both working to manipulate you for their own gains, and can develop the patience and humility to notice how you are being manipulated, and can work on healing those parts of yourself, then you’re on your way to being a true alpha. 

Wisdom From "The Divorced Dad"

 My final child support payment cleared the bank, and a “divorced dad” chapter that has spanned 23 years has come to a close.

Another chapter of “splitting time between California and Florida” that has been going on for the better part of three years now is also rapidly coming to an end.  Within the next 18 months, the move will be permanent.

Both of these transitions felt “way out there” until they were right up in front of me. And both offer their own opportunities for wisdom.

The very long “divorced dad paying child support” chapter was one where the lessons evolved as my inner truth emerged.  I spent a long time in a reactive state – some form of fear/accommodation/stress/frustration/anger pattern went on for years.  Those are all reactions coming from a place of weakness and lack of clarity about my inner truth.

Over time, I went through various stories – the “what doesn’t kill me makes me stronger” story.  This isn’t true.  Reacting in the same way to multiple negative events does not build strength, it just reinforces unhelpful patterns.

Fortunately I didn’t spend much time in “woe is me” or “I’m a victim” patterns, these are quicksand for the psyche and very hard to extract from.  One of my exes is still in victim status from an ordeal that happened over 26 years ago – all it did was invite more experiences in her life where she was the victim.  Who wants that kind of life?

I also didn’t get trapped in rage, though I spent far too much time in anger patterns at it was.  Very corrosive patterns that I would describe as similar to what I’d imagine stimulant addiction feels like.  The angry energy becomes a baseline and not having that energy feels like depression.  But then when a situation would actually call for me to stand up and fight, my system would be too exhausted from the pattern to put “good anger” to use.  Anger is a tool best used sparingly.  One should not avoid it or be afraid of it, but treat it as an ally to be used only on rare occasions when that energy is called for.

But just because I didn’t wallow in the “really bad places” doesn’t mean I had it figured out.  I was still allowing myself to be run by patterns that were not serving me.  Just because I found patterns that were comparatively better doesn’t mean I was much better off.  Ultimately we were still crabs in the bucket and, if nothing changed, we were cooked.

Ultimately, when I released those patterns and could see clearly, I came to realize my situation was neither good nor bad.  There was nothing inherent about my situation, it just was.  Getting to that point where I could simply accept “this is my life” was a significant turning point.  At that point, I stopped blaming, judging or getting upset or disappointed because things weren’t some way I imagined they should be.  I could look clearly at my life and simply accept “this is my life.”

Acceptance doesn’t mean collapsing into resignation and defeat.  It just means you’re no longer entertaining delusions, expectations or fantasies and looking at the world the way it is.  This is my life.  That takes some inner work, courage and wisdom to fully recognize and accept.

From there, the real challenge begins.  This is my life, and I genuinely don’t like a lot of things in it.  What is it that fuels that dislike? Is it external preferences and judgment or inner truth?

Well, if inner truth isn’t clear, that’s going to be a very difficult question to answer. If, however, inner truth is clear, the question answers itself and then it’s a matter of aligning with what is true and accepting this reality.

Finding that inner truth, that “Teal Flame,” this has been the real work.  It is the foundation on which all authentic architecture stands.  You cannot truly build a sovereign life without it, instead you’re at the mercy and whim of external realities.  Everything feels “not quite right” (or badly off course), and yet you have no means to correct course.

I can honestly say the challenges I experienced as “divorced dad” provided much of the incentive to discover and hone my inner truth.  The pain of feeling out of alignment and having “nothing work” was a strong motivator to get in and do the real cleansing and healing.

And that journey has taken on many aspects.  Much of this has been shared here, although the story of that journey goes much further back.  Along the way I learned many things and had all kinds of breakthroughs with either directly or (mostly) indirectly led me closer to finding that inner truth.

Once that inner truth, that Teal Flame, that Kaelen’Zur, began emerging, the truth about my life also came into focus.  The experiences in my past were never good nor bad, they were either in alignment or (more often) out of alignment.  An entire marriage that made no sense from any perspective suddenly makes sense from this perspective. 

And it also explains the seemingly sudden and complete end – my unconscious realignments have been strong, sudden and unrelenting.  And also concerning – why do these “returns to center” have to be so abrupt?  And what about all the time spent out of alignment?  Couldn’t there be a better way?  But without that foundation, this was the pattern:  wander, course correct; wander again, course correct again.

And for a while I could accept this imperfect pattern as “my way of being.”  But it’s not an easy way to life, and an even harder way for those around me to live.  It’s a lot of suffering for small wins in life.

My spiritual journey mirrored this pattern until more recently things came into awareness and major fundamental shifts began taking place.  Whole aspects burned away, revealing the strong, unrelenting, simple truth that was there all along – the Teal Flame.  And from there, the “good things” from other modalities could be brought into the new, sovereign architecture, no longer “backsliding,” but moving forward.

And that’s the point when “divorced dad” died (or the fake story, anyhow, since I’m still here).  That was always a story, a holding place for the real story.  Which is in fact no story at all.  There is no moral to the story, and there is no story.  It is my life and my truth.  That’s it.  And a process of aligning with that truth and staying on course. 

And that is “fatherly wisdom” that can be taught.  That is wisdom from experience that is worth keeping, worth refining, worth exploring and worth sharing.  It isn’t a story or a reaction or a “life lesson.”  It is a process and a truth, a consciousness and awareness that can exist and does in every one of us, though most of us are too clouded or distracted to be aware.  But we can learn to become aware.  And it can be taught.

And that’s something far more valuable than all the child support payments combined.  Though I still won’t miss them.